Friendships

Over the years, friends will come and go. You'll leave old ones behind as new ones come into your life.

I've realized this is a reoccurring theme in my life, and sometimes it saddens me. Part of it is my fault, but I feel like I can't always take the blame. I've moved throughout my life, most before the age of 12. But I realized this alone has had its impact. I can remember friends from when I was only 5 who stayed around for a few years, even after countless moves on both parts. But, eventually distance takes its toll as well as lack of communication. In one way, I'm happy for the increase use of cell phones, the domination of Facebook, and countless other networking tools.

About two months ago my "best friend" from 2nd and 3rd grade found me on Facebook. We exchanged a few messages, reminisced and that was it. Mainly because I realized that they road her life had taken was so far from mine. Me, I'm 500 miles away at a great university hoping to attend an even better grad school in 2 years. Her, she spends her time making illegal movie copies with her boyfriend and is "thinking" about going to college. Not that I'm dissing her way of life, but it was apparent to me she wasn't someone I cared to have in my life anymore.

I've realized in most cases the reason I've left friends behind is because of my ambitions, which is great. School has also lent a hand in my lost friendships. No longer seeing the same people every day means you no longer care to reach out. Or sometimes, you do try to reach out only to be shot down. Sometimes there are relationships I miss, or wish had grown stronger.

In the scheme of things, I try not to regret the friendships lost. In years to come they may be rekindled, or at least contact will be made on some accounts. However, I'm proud of who I'm becoming without those people. And I'm proud of the people I currently call my friends. Most have the same ambitions and goals I do, or at least similar. I think when you reach college age that becomes important, you begin to desire friendships with those who resemble you in some ways.

I have these thoughts when I find myself bored and surfing Facebook. I see pictures and status updates of people I use to be friends with. People I spent hours with, eating lunch together at school, and just hanging out. I realize that some people I miss that connection with, others I find that I'm surprised at what they're doing with their life (good or bad).

Sometimes I wish rekindling friendships was as easy as "Hey, remember that time we..." But I know it's not that easy. Which is why I enjoy the friendships I do have, and try not to think about the ones lost.